its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
The air taste purple.
Randomize
