You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
I need Jameson.
Yea? How do you think I feel? Your job during the delivery is to keep that flask ready. The moment our kid pops out, I'm taking a shot.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
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