That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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