hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize
