We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
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