well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
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