I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
Randomize
