I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
Randomize
