well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
Randomize
