Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
You remember that guy i fucked in Ireland who stopped in the middle to talk about why he had 8 pillows on his bed? Yeah he's following me on twitter...
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
I'm on tinder and every time somebody says something too creepy for me I start quoting scripture at them. My boobs are like missionaries.
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
Randomize
