Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
In preparation for st patty's day I finally had a shamrock shake, and I invested in an app that will apparently keep me from drunkenly texting you pictures of my tits this weekend. Please let me know if you want to not be put on the "forbidden" list!
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
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