I'm at the doctor and the male nurse (haha) asked me if I smoked, drank or did drugs, and when he said 'drugs' he looked me right in the eye and did a perfect wrist rocket.
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
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