try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
maybe you met your husband and you just don't know it yet
and other hilarious jokes you can tell yourself
Randomize