There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
Randomize
