Went to the doctors. She saw my " I love beer" tattoo. All she said was " My drunken tat is of just one word. "Cornnuts.". Then said Mexico was "awesome." And sent me on my way. Yeah. She's my favorite doctor.
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Randomize
