Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
Realized I'm still to drunk to comprehend work emails. Marked them all as unread. Here's to responsible hang overs.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
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