i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
