I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
Randomize
