I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
Randomize
