he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
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