I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
My ex-wife, who I haven't heard from since the divorce, just Amazoned me cherry flavored massage oil and a rainbow caps with the message "Happy Pride". What's the polite response?
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
Randomize