Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
pray to the hookup gods
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
