Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
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