yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
Randomize
