glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
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