so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
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