Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
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