My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
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