Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
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