If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
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