My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
Randomize
