i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
Randomize