As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
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