He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
Randomize
