She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
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