Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
Randomize