Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
The best revenge is premature balding
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
