Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize
