That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
WHY THE FUCK IS MY BATH TUB FILLED WITH MUD?!
1. You were drunk 2. You wanted a mud bath\n3. We tried to talk you out of it, but you kept throwing dirt at us
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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