awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
New low: just hacked my moms facebook
thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
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