I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
I think you'll appreciate my way of waking up today: Under my cubicle, boxed in by boxes of printer paper, and hung over. I don't even know how the fuck I got in here in the middle of the night. I went to my car and fell back asleep. I'm now 2 1/2 hours late.
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
