PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
You were so high at Ikea last night that you were convinced you could speak Swedish. The whole the time you were our navigator and when we got to the cashier you were hitting on the lady. When she gave you her number you told her you were saving her number as Inglfurfta cuaue she must be swedish since she works there.
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
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