Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
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