So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
Randomize
