whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
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