She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
Just invented taco cereal.
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
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