The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
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