is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
I'm drunk enough to talk Barbara Walters outta her panties
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
Randomize
