why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
Randomize
