Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
